Feeling Lighter
Life without booze is getting EASIER. I never thought those words would come out of my mouth. It's so crazy. I used to think about it all the time. Every bar or happy hour sign used to glimmer in my face and seem so attractive. When I was first trying to get sober last year, I would literally not be able to find the strength to steer my car away from Trader Joes to pick up a bottle of wine for my dinner. It was like my hands couldn't control the steering wheel. I had to turn into the parking lot. It was so annoying. Being drunk was all I could think about. It consumed me. I was always chasing that reality escape. I just thought I would always be a slave to alcohol. I thought it would just be one of those constant demons in my life. I thought I would always wake up with red stained teeth and a headache. That's just how life was. But now... 4 months into sobriety, the dark boozey cloud that hung over my head all the time is FADING. I have more space in my head for peaceful and healthy thoughts. It's still hard to think about forever without it. So let's not think that way. That's why we have to live in today, right? Today is all we have. This weekend sister #2 is venturing into a 3 day booze filled music festival. I wish you could be with you sissy! But you are so strong. I'm really proud of you for still going even though I'm sure there will be some tough moments. Just remember that you're not alone. And think of all the positives. You won't have to wake up hung over and you'll be in complete control of your actions. No lost keys, no drunk texts to people you don't want to talk to...no blackouts! Yesssssss. You're going to be ok! And its only going to keep being easier!!! We're only 4 months in! I hear it only keeps getting better:) Goodbye alcohol monster.....be gone with you. You do nothing for us anymore. Keep fighting!
You guys may hear this all the time, but I love it. It's the serenity prayer. "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference"
I cannot change the fact that I am an alcoholic. I need to constantly accept that, because it is something that will always be. I can change my attitude though. I need courage all the time to live in the present and to live with love and joy. I could also use some more wisdom in my life. For every decision. Big or small. Keep up the good fight everyone!
xoxo
Sister #1