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A little sister background- the not so pretty and the pretty

Wow sister number 2 has been beating me to it lately. It's about time I check in. In case anyone was wondering…tomorrow is her 90 days!!!!!! don't tell her I told you. I honestly couldn't be more proud. So here's a little bit more of a background on me and sister number 2. We used to be each other's accomplices. We'd help each other cover up our boozy lifestyles so that we could have a nice, normal day with our family without suspicions being raised. We used to be the type of sisters who could tell each other anything because we wouldn't judge -- knowing that our own stories of last night were probably worse. For example, in our drinking days…sister number 2 might frantically text me in the morning--"Hey, I need a ride to the uber guy's house, I left my purse and my keys in their car last night… I was SO drunk. Ugh" or sister number 2 might ask me, "How was your night last night? did anything bad happen?" My response might be something like "uhhh….It was fun from what I can remember. I peed the bed again though." Yikes. Ok….pause for a second. In what world is a grown woman peeing her bed from drinking way too much ok? How unattractive. The big book in AA talks about how alcohol brought us to places of "pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization." Waking up in soaking wet sheets with a pounding headache would definitely fall under that category I would say. It's awkward writing about this. But maybe some of you can relate. Having no control over yourself and how you act is scary. Let's face it. I'm a shit show when I drink. I've been called a tornado. A downright disaster who didn't care about anyone or anything but herself. I don't have to live like that anymore. I am so thankful that today, when sister number 2 and I ask each other how our nights were, we don't get some crazy story full of drama and embarrassment. Back in the day, we would always hope that when our phone rang and it was the other sister on the phone, that it wasn't an emergency. We lived lives of chaos. Always losing things, always panicking the next day….feeling like an ugly person, and deep down, feeling really lost and scared. But then, there was a shift. A mental shift, and a spiritual shift. Finally the madness has stopped. THANK YOU GOD. And we are learning to love our sober selves.This weekend, I have no doubt in my mind that sister number 2 is safe. She's in Malibu hiking and hammocking, and the best part -- not drinking. And I'm over here blogging and sipping on sparkling french berry lemonade from Trader Joes (it's delicious for those who are looking for a fun, non alcoholic drink). This sober business is really bringing us together. We're still each other's accomplices, don't get me wrong. But it's a different kind. It's the good kind. Life is good! I love you sissy. You're a beautiful person. LET'S KEEP IT UP!

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