83 Days and FREEEE
Sister #1 speaking
Ah. Where do I start? I've had quite the wild roller coaster ride with alcohol over the past decade of my life. First it made life fun. Then it made life embarrassing. Then it made life plain miserable. Rewind to me taking my first shot of vodka at a New Year's Eve party in high school--- feeling like I was completely free and invincible---then fast forward to a year ago where I was shivering in a cold jail cell. I was no longer free, or invincible. The party was over. It took me a few months after my DUI to get it through my thick, stubborn, alcoholic head that I had to be DONE. Do I wish I could drink like other people? Of course. Do I wish I could be satisfied with just 1, 2 or even 3 drinks? Obviously. But once I get started I don't want to stop. The craving kicks in, and I'm a slave to alcohol. I've heard people say that for an alcoholic, one drink is too many, and a thousand is never enough. This is SO true for me. Today, I am in a state of acceptance. Acceptance that I can't manage alcohol, and that for me, its poison. I tried so hard to hold on to it. I loved it. Until it turned on me. So booze, here's a message for you. You don't own me, and I don't want you in my life anymore. It sounds like a breakup doesn't it? This may sound dramatic, but to me, its my reality. Alcohol no longer brings any benefit to my life. Now that this toxic crap is out of my system, life can take on so much more meaning. After over two months of sobriety, it no longer owns my thoughts like it used to. I used to be counting down the minutes until 5 o'clock rolled around so I could go make dinner and drink a glass of wine. Which turned into a bottle and a half more often than not. Waking up in a fog and trying to put on a pretty face at work became exhausting. Now, in sobriety I wake up refreshed, clear headed, and content. Don't get me wrong, I still wait around for 5 o'clock to come. But now, instead of finding me at happy hour, you'll find me out on a run and then rewarding myself with ice cream afterwards. Today life is so good. There's so much to be thankful for. Today I am thankful for my sobriety. We CAN DO THIS.